April Fools
by NCISMcGee
Summary: Who is the practical joker in the lab? This was written a few seasons ago and I just got around to posting it!
1. Monday, March 28

Okay, so this may seem WAY out of character, but it is based on some of the crazy things we used to do at my old job. (Maybe that's why I don't work there any more!) Anyway, I wrote this quite a few seasons ago so Sara, Warrick and Grissom are all still here.

Here goes- ENJOY!

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"Oh my God! Stokes, you are so dead!" Sara screamed.

"What did I do?"

Sara turned to face Nick, revealing a huge coffee stain on her shirt.

"How is that my fault?"

Catherine and Warrick walked into the room just as Sara started yelling at Nick again. "There is a hole in the cup! You are NOT funny!"

Nick looked helplessly at Catherine, who shook her head. "I swear it wasn't me!"

"Right!" Sara stormed out, heading to the locker room to change her shirt. Warrick and Catherine both gave Nick a look.

"What? I didn't do it. I swear to God."

"Okay Nick." Catherine answered sarcastically.

"Fine don't believe me." Nick went about making his own cup of coffee after carefully checking the cup. Sara rejoined them, still looking really mad, and they all sat down to wait for Gil to hand out assignments. Nick took a drink of his coffee and immediately choked.

Sara smiled. "Serves you right."

Nick shook his head. "No, I didn't choke. It's salt. Somebody's up to no good around here."

Just then, Jim Brass walked into the room carrying a paper clip chain. They all looked at him funny. "You were saying?" He held up the chain. They couldn't help but snicker.

"See Sara, I told you it wasn't me." Nick whined.

"Okay, maybe it wasn't you. Who then?"

Gil entered the room. "Who then what?"

Nick answered. "Who put salt in the sugar bowl, punched a hole in Sara's cup and connected all of Jim's paper clips together?"

Gil shook his head and looked at Brass, who was still holding the chain. "I have no idea." He couldn't help but smile. "Okay, fun is over, we have work to do."

Jim sighed and shrugged. "I'll be in my office."

Gil handed out assignments and the rest of the shift went by without incident.


	2. Tuesday, March 29

The next night they were all in the break room again when Gil came in looking flustered. "All right, who stapled all of my paperwork together?"

They all suppressed their laughter while denying any involvement. After using a staple remover, he handed out some information and a few new cases. Catherine had been writing notes about her current case when she suddenly yelled out.

"What the hell?"

They all looked at her, and then Gil asked, "What's wrong Catherine?"

"This is NOT funny!"

"What?"

"Disappearing ink! That's what!"

She slapped Nick's arm when he laughed at her. "Ouch. Hey, I got mine last night. Looks like we have a serial joker on our hands."

They all looked at each other and said the same thing at the same time. "Greg."

Greg looked like a deer in the headlights of a semi when the entire team walked into the DNA lab. "What?" He asked innocently.

"Nice job Greggo. You've had your fun, now enough is enough." Nick said with a smile.

"What are you talking about?"

"Last night. The salt, the hole in the cup, the paper clips. Then tonight. Grissom's papers, Catherine's pen. Any of this sound familiar?"

"No. I was off last night and I didn't do anything tonight. I swear."

"You were off last night?"

"Yeah. Gee, nice to know you guys missed me." Greg sat down in his chair only to find himself on the floor when the chair gave way. Everyone laughed. Greg looked up at them from the floor. "You were saying something about practical jokes?"

Nick helped Greg up from the floor. "Okay, maybe it wasn't you. We're back to the question of who once more."

Catherine spoke up. "Who's the only one in here who hasn't been had?"

They all looked at Warrick. "Whoa. Don't even go there, not my style."

Catherine patted him on the shoulder and smiled. "We're watching you now buddy."

He smiled back. "Go ahead, watch all you want, I didn't do it."

Once again Gil broke up the conversation. "All right everyone, back to work. Cases aren't going to solve themselves."

They all went back to work, watching everyone else a little more than usual.

At the end of shift, Nick and Warrick were in the locker room talking. "What the hell?" Warrick yelled and made a face as he was putting on his shoe.

Nick looked at him. "What?"

"Looks like our joker has struck again."

"Huh?"

Warrick turned his shoe over and let the raw egg run out. Nick choked on a laugh. Warrick sounded disgusted. "Ha ha. We have GOT to find out who is doing this."

Brass had been walking by the locker room when he heard Warrick yell, and then saw him dump the egg out of his shoe. "Probably the same person who decided it would be funny to tape all the drawers shut on my desk with clear packaging tape."

Nick and Warrick both snickered. Nick looked at Brass, who was actually smiling. "Well, I'll catch you guys later."

Brass left and Nick and Warrick cleaned up the egg mess and headed home.


	3. Wednesday, March 30

Catherine smiled at Warrick as he walked into the break room. "So, I hear you had an

interesting end of shift this morning."

He looked at Nick who just shrugged. "Yeah, I guess Nick here couldn't wait to share. Did he also tell you Brass got it again?"

"Really?"

"Yep. Somebody taped all the drawers shut on his desk with clear tape. I guess big mouth here neglected to tell you that part."

"Hey man, I was letting Catherine know you probably weren't the joker since we worked together all night and I know you didn't put the egg in your shoe."

Warrick just shook his head.

"Okay boys, I guess it wasn't either one of you. This is getting to be a real mystery now. Who the hell is it?" They looked at each other, wondering.

Things were pretty uneventful for the first part of the shift. "All right, who in the hell did this?" Warrick yelled from the locker room.

Sara and Catherine were in the hall and looked at each other, smiling. They went to the locker room and saw Warrick standing in front of his locker, hands on his hips. He looked at them with a disgusted look on his face. "This has gone way too far."

Catherine broke out in laughter when she walked over and looked in the locker. Sara gave her a funny look. She choked out, "Ballistics gel."

Sara joined Catherine in her laughter when she looked for herself, finding Warrick's entire locker filled with the gel.

"Still think it's me?" He asked sarcastically.

Catherine shook her head. "No. Now I'm really confused. Somebody is trying to fool us. I think we have to figure out who played a trick on themselves to throw us off."

"Throw us off what?" Nick asked from the doorway.

"Well, I think Warrick has been pretty much ruled out as the joker. I don't think he would fill his own locker with ballistics gel."

Nick laughed. "Oh man, that's a good one."

Warrick glared at him. "Keep laughing Stokes. Maybe it was you after all."

Nick held up his hands in surrender. "I swear to God. I don't even know how to mix that stuff up."

Warrick grinned wickedly. "But Catherine does."

"Hey, I'm not the only person around here who does."

Nick chuckled again. "Well, I'm going to go check something out on this case, you guys can figure out who's playing around. See ya later." He left the locker room laughing.

Sara and Catherine both patted Warrick on the back and headed to the DNA lab to check on their own case.

A few minutes later, Nick could be heard in the hall. "Okay, this has gone far enough! Damn it, this is NOT FUNNY anymore!"

Sara, Greg and Catherine walked out of the DNA lab and looked at Nick, smiles on their faces.

"Better not let me find out who is doing this 'cause I'm going to kick somebody's ..."

"NICK!" Sara was looking at him with a huge smile on her face. "Let me guess, you've been hit by our prankster again."

"Yeah, this has gone beyond funny."

Warrick poked his head out of the locker room and listened to Nick rant. Sara smirked at Nick. "Oh, so it's funny when it's everybody else but you?"

"No, I didn't say that, but this is keeping me from doing my job. Damn it, they shrink wrapped my Tahoe!"

Warrick's howl of laughter could be heard from the locker room. Greg and Catherine nearly fell over, in tears from laughing so hard.

"Yeah, real funny. You gonna help me cut that crap off the truck? This has got to stop."

"Lighten up Nicky, you're not the only one around here getting pranked." Catherine said with a smile.

"Whatever", he mumbled under his breath as he headed out to unwrap his SUV.

Everyone watched each other carefully for the rest of the shift, but there were no further incidents.


	4. Thursday, March 31

By the fourth night, everyone was paranoid. Whoever was doing the practical joking was doing it well. Nobody could figure out who it was, or catch him or her in the act. Catherine stomped into the break room about halfway through shift. Warrick and Nick started laughing.

"Styrofoam peanuts! How in the hell does someone get enough Styrofoam peanuts to fill an SUV? I'm with you Nick; somebody needs a good butt kicking."

Sara walked in and caught the end of Catherine's comment. "What happened this time?"

Warrick answered through his laughter. "They filled her truck with foam peanuts."

Sara snickered. Nick looked at her and smiled. "You know that means you are next."

"What?"

"Well, we've all been had twice; you only had the hole in your cup. You're up for the next big one."

"Not true Nick. Greg and Grissom only had one each, it might be their turn."

"Whose turn for what?" Gil asked from the doorway. They all looked at him and smiled.

"What?"

Sara spoke as Gil went to get a cup of coffee. "Well, Nick, Warrick, Brass and Catherine have been hit twice by our joker. That leaves Greg, you and me for the next round.

"You can narrow that down to you and Gris." They turned and looked at Greg and laughed hysterically. Gil choked on his coffee. Greg was covered in green slime, his hair matted down to his head. After he caught his breath, Nick asked Greg, "Man, what the hell happened to you? You look like a big booger!"

Greg huffed. "I don't know. I opened the door to the DNA lab and next thing I knew, I was coated in this gunk. This is WAY over the top." He pouted and left the room, leaving the rest of them laughing.

Catherine looked at Sara and Gil. "So, who's going to be next?"

Sara and Gil looked at each other in wonder. Gil shrugged it off. "I don't know and I'm not going to sit around and worry about it either."

"Nobody is going to get one past me." Sara said confidently.

"We'll see." Catherine responded with a smirk. Once more, they all went back to work wondering when the joker would strike next.

They were all jumpy for the rest of the shift. They checked their cars every ten minutes, made sure there was nothing perched above any doorframes before entering a room, and basically avoided the locker room. No one let his or her cups or pens out of sight and

jumped at any sudden noises. Towards the end of the shift, Sara was storming down the hall, soaking wet and looking very angry.

Nick and Warrick were also in the hall when they saw her coming. "Uh oh, it looks like somebody has fallen victim to the serial joker once again."

Nick tried not to laugh, and failed miserably. Gil had emerged from his office when he heard Sara yell. "Somebody is going to pay for this!"

He tried not to smile, but it was hard. "What happened?"

"That is it! Who the hell thought it would be funny to turn off the bathroom light and douse me with water?"

Laughter could be heard from the DNA lab and Sara looked to see Catherine and Greg doubled over in hysterics.

"Who did it? I'm NOT amused!"

Nick and Warrick ran down the hall laughing, in fear that Sara would kill them right there with her bare hands.

Gil tried to remain calm. "I think you should head home, shift is just about over anyway."

She glared hard at him. "Somebody is going to get it." She mumbled as she stormed down the hall towards the locker room.

Gil went in his office and closed the door. Hysterical laughter could be heard through the door.


	5. Friday, April 1

Sara was still fuming when she arrived for shift. Nick and Warrick were still acting like school children, stifling their giggles when she walked in the room. She was about to say something when Gil burst into the room, frantically looking around.

Nick looked at him funny. "Hey Gris, what's up?"

"Somebody left the lid off my tarantula tank!" Nick and Warrick quickly jumped up off the couch.

"Aw man! You mean that thing is on the loose! Gross."

Warrick looked at Nick. "Gross? That sounds so school girlish."

"Shut up man. I hate that creepy little sucker."

Gil continued to search the room to no avail. Sara had started to help him when Nick and Warrick left the room. They heard a commotion from the DNA lab and headed that way.

They saw Greg not looking very happy.

"Hey Greggo, what's going on?" Nick asked as they entered the lab.

"Somebody thought it would be funny if they sewed the arms shut on our lab coats. That is so childish."

Warrick laughed. "Who are you to talk about childish?"

Greg was about to respond when a loud shriek was heard from down the hall. They looked at each other and ran towards the sound.

Catherine emerged from the ladies room looking very flustered. "Is this ever going to stop? Who thought Vaseline on the toilet seat was a good idea?"

Nick received a sharp smack to the head when he laughed.

"Oh stuff it Stokes!" She stomped off down the hall and Greg and Warrick laughed at Nick's stunned expression. Before Nick could say a word, another loud complaint was heard.

"What the hell is going on in here today?" Warrick asked as they headed towards yet another hapless victim. They found the source of the yelling when they happened upon Jacqui in the print lab.

She was looking in a mirror and wiping at her eyes. She turned and looked at them when they entered the lab. They couldn't help but laugh when they saw her.

"Who put shoe polish on the microscope? Sanders! Is this one of your juvenile pranks?"

She stalked towards him. He hid behind Nick. "No! I swear! I know nothing about it!"

Brass poked his head in the lab, hearing the commotion as he was walking down the hall. He looked at Jacqui and smiled. "Ah, I see the shenanigans continue. Don't kill Greg just yet Jacqui, this time I think he's actually innocent."

He patted Greg on the shoulder and turned and left. They all held in their snickers when they spoiled the sign on Jim's back that said 'Frisk me'. As if that wasn't funny enough, Hodges had passed Brass in the hail and they saw the sign on his back that read 'Grissom's pet'. They all bust out laughing when Hodges gave them a funny look, oblivious to the source of their amusement.

Greg made a break for the DNA lab before Jacqui could say anything further to him. Nick and Warrick assured her she had gotten all the black off her face before heading back to the break room to see if Gil had found his spider.

Just as they walked in the door Sara spewed her coffee all over the place.

"What the hell?" Nick said.

"Ugh! That is so nasty! Who the hell replaced the coffee with soy sauce? That is just so wrong."

"It's getting dangerous in here. I think I'm going to go home sick. It's safer there." Warrick said half seriously.

Nick helped Sara clean up the mess she had made. "So did Grissom find that creepy pet of his?"

"No, he's still checking." Nick looked around, hoping the offending arachnid was not in the room. He walked over to the sink and turned on the water to wash his hands. He was rewarded with a dousing of water as the hand sprayer hosed him down. Sara and Warrick laughed as he tried to turn off the water. He finally got it shut off and looked closer at the sprayer. A piece of black electrical tape held the handle down so when the water was turned on, it automatically started spraying.

"You were saying about dangerous Rick? All I can say is revenge is so sweet. Wait till I find out who's behind all this."

Warrick walked over to Nick. "I heard that."

They hit their fists together and nodded at each other. At that moment, a very mad looking Eckley walked into the break room.

"Have you seen Grissom?"

They all nodded a negative and tried to hide their smiles.

"When I find out which one of you graveyard idiots toilet papered my car, there will be hell to pay!"

He turned and stormed out again as the three of them started laughing. Nick went to the locker room to change his shirt and Sara and Warrick dumped the coffee pot and started to make a pot of real coffee. Just as Catherine and Greg walked into the room, a high- pitched scream was heard coming from the locker room.

They all ran to the locker room, only to find Nick sprawled on the floor. "That is just not right!"

"What the hell happened to you man?"

Warrick walked over to Nick's locker and looked to find a very realistic looking rubber tarantula dangling from a string. He started to laugh then helped Nick up off the floor.

Nick playfully punched Warrick in the arm. "Shut up! You know I hate spiders." He pulled the rubber spider from his locker and threw it at Greg, Sara and Catherine, who were by the door laughing at him.

Hodges appeared at the door. "Hey Stokes, I have something for you on that evidence you brought me."

"Okay, I'll be right there man."

Hodges nodded and looked at all of them like they were insane. Warrick, Nick and Greg watched carefully to see if he still had the sign on his back when he turned to leave. He did indeed still have a sign on his back, only it now read 'I have no clue'. Hodges shook his head as he walked down the hall to the sound of laughter.

Things quieted down for a while after the rubber spider incident. Hodges still walked around with no idea of the sign on his back and somehow during the night, Brass' sign had changed to 'I've got a donut in my pocket'. Gil continued to search for his AWOL spider, and the rest of the CSI's and lab techs kept busy with their work.

Everyone started to let their guard down when nothing happened for a while. It was actually fairly quiet in the building when Warrick let out a loud yell. Sara and Catherine were in the garage processing a car. They looked at each other.

"Oh no, not again" Sara groaned.

They walked into the hall just in time to see Warrick emerge from a lab covered in white foam. He did not look happy.

"I've had just about enough of this! It was funny at first, now it's getting old."

Catherine walked over and picked up a manila envelope from the floor. "The old shaving cream bomb."

Sara gave her a puzzled look.

"You fill the envelope with shaving cream, put the open end under the edge of the door and stomp. You see the results."

Warrick raised his eyebrows at her. "So, you know how to set this up huh?"

"Hey! I was in the garage with Sara; there is no way I could have done this."

Gil rounded the corner, still looking for his spider. He looked at Warrick then shook his head and kept on walking.

Warrick shook his head as well. "I have to go get cleaned up."

Sara and Catherine headed back to the garage and Warrick to the locker room.

About fifteen minutes before shift ended, everyone's pagers went off. There was a message to meet in the break room. Catherine, Sara, Nick, Warrick and Greg all met in the break room to find envelopes on the table. Each was labeled with one of their names and a message that told them what order to open them up in.

The one labeled 'open first' was address to Greg. He looked at the others and hesitantly opened the envelope. He found a picture of him lying on the lab floor, another picture of him covered in the green goo and a note card with the word 'Happy' written on it. "What the hell does this mean?" he asked.

The second envelope was addressed to Sara. She opened hers to find a picture of her with the coffee stain on her blouse, a picture of her storming down the hall soaking wet and another card that said 'April' on it.

She looked puzzled as Warrick opened the third envelope. His contained a picture of his locker full of the gel, a picture of him covered in shaving cream and a card that said 'fools' on it.

Catherine tore open her envelope to find a picture of her SUV full of Styrofoam, a picture of her smacking Nick in the head outside the bathroom and a card that read 'day' on it.

Nick opened up the final envelope to find a picture of his shrink-wrapped Tahoe, a picture of him lying on the locker room floor and a letter. He opened the letter and read it out loud.

_Dear Graveyard Shift, _

_I hope you all have had a fun week; I sure have. Now take the cards from each envelope_

_and put them on the table in the order you opened them. This should clear things up for_

_you._

They all looked at the cards arranged on the table to spell out 'Happy April fools day'. Then Nick read the last part of the letter.

_By the way Nick, the spider never got out, you big baby. Now everyone turn and look at the door._

They all turned and there was Grissom standing in the doorway with a huge smile on his face. He was also yielding a super soaker.

"You guys are just too gullible." He hosed them down before running down the hall and out the front door.

Gil ran past Eckley, slapping him on the back.

"Hey Conrad!" he yelled before he jumped in his SUV and sped off.

The others came out the door as Gil was tearing out of the parking lot. They all started laughing as Eckley gave them a look.

"Graveyard" he mumbled before turning to walk in the building.

Everyone broke out in laughter again as they spotted the sign on Eckley's back that read 'Graveyard rules!'


End file.
